“Should have stayed”

We were doing our best with what we had but every time it seemed like we were getting somewhere they would come in and take it away and we would have to start all over again.

Not from scratch, we learned the first times to always keep some of the work in the back where they didn’t look.

Why were they doing this? Was the question on everyone’s lips yet none of us dared to ask.

They didn’t speak to us and we didn’t want any trouble so we didn’t speak to them.

It was the safest course of action, not to speak.

God knows what they would have done to us had we tried to stop them from taking our work.

It went on like that, for years, we got somewhere and they came in and stole the work we’d done until finally one day when we had a major breakthrough and they didn’t come.

We waited but none came.

For days we sat in that lab and none came until finally, the doors opened and for the first time since we stepped inside, we were allowed to go outside.

God knows I should have stayed in that lab.


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“I’m doing my best”

You know, I’m doing my best out here and I would appreciate if one of you would support me.

Or both, that would be great but I know that won’t be happening.

Just one of you, please, tell me I’m doing something right.

Give me some encouragement to keep going because at the time I don’t know if I want to.

Not if you two ungrateful bastards are going to be sitting there smiling at me and telling me I’m not doing enough.

I’m doing all I can.

So can I please get some appreciation in this house?

If not then you can both get out.


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“A potential for danger”

There was always a potential for danger.

Something could always go wrong.

I didn’t understand what back then.

I thought everything would go well.

But I wasn’t counting on everything going against me.

I didn’t actually think anything would happen.

Even though I knew there was a potential for danger.

A potential something could go wrong.

And someone could get hurt.


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“Nothing I could do”

It was starting to become worse.

Nothing I was doing seemed to work.

I couldn’t explain it.

Nothing was working.

Nothing.

And I’d tried so hard to make it.

I’d spent so many hours trying to build something that I could be proud of.

That my family could be proud of.

And now it wasn’t working.

Nothing was working.

And there was nothing else I could do.


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“When it was only my father and I”

The trees were white as they once were.

I didn’t expect to see them like that again.

Like they were when I was a kid.

When my father would take me out on the lake and just sit there in the quiet.

He and I.

I didn’t think I would see that again.

The world is warmer now.

The trees never freeze.

But this year they did.

And it reminds me of when I was young.

A time when life was simple.

When it was only my father and I.


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“On his own”

He was in trouble.

And he needed my help.

But I wasn’t going to help him this time.

He’d done it before.

Too many times.

This time I wasn’t going to be there and get him out.

I’d given him enough chances.

Now he was on his own.


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“The world had changed”

Had the world changed while I was away?

Maybe.

But I hadn’t.

I was still the same person who left all those years ago.

Left to explore the unknown.

All the places we were yet to find.

I was still the same but the world had changed.

I’d missed it all.

So many things, I had missed them all.

And now I was returning to a world I could no longer understand.

A world that could no longer understand me.


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